Andrea (Carlesi) Roberts . . . Tribute to a Dear Friend

     Our circle and KHS graduating class of 1987 has suffered a sad loss with the passing of a dear friend and colleague, Andrea (Carlesi) Roberts. Many of us knew her as Andi. She leaves behind a loving husband, Brian, and two beautiful children, Carolann (6) and Dillon (3).

copyright 2011 Jennifer Domenick, Love Life Images

    

     I had the pleasure of growing up with her, having known her for over 30 years. Our social circle spanned across numerous genres in elementary, junior and high school: cheerleaders, athletes, band members, drill team, majorettes - she was friends with everyone. She had an infectious laugh - I remember hearing it in the hallways when I would be retrieving things from my locker and thinking, yep, I know that laugh anywhere. 

     The word "hero" is befitting of her. She was an American soldier in Iraq flying helicopters for 101st Airborne. When I first learned she was going overseas to fight for our country, I recall thinking, wow, followed soon by amazing . . . how incredibly brave she is . . . what an unbelievable accomplishment.  She and I kept in touch during the time she was serving in Iraq. On occasion, I would receive an email from her when she was able to access a computer. They would have a little downtime for some fun and she shared with me that they had just finished watching a camel spider fight. She knew I had an insane phobia of spiders and relished in providing me details of their size, color and how crooked their legs looked as they fought in a makeshift ring. She shared that they had to get creative sometimes in the desert to produce a little fun and she immediately thought of me when witnessing these spider fights. Nice. I still get the heebie-jeebies thinking about that story, but I laugh and am thankful that I have this fun memory with her. She served our country well and made us proud. A true fighter. She fought two battles: one for our country and the other against leukemia. She is the epitome of courage. 

     A few months ago, I had heard she was in the hospital receiving treatment for her latest bout with leukemia and I decided, on a whim, to call her one evening. I wasn't sure if she would be up for talking, but she answered her cell phone on the first ring and recognized my voice right away. She sounded groggy, obviously under the effects of the meds, but her spirits seemed to be up. Brian had just left from visiting her and she was alone at the moment, stating this was a good time for her to talk. She started asking me questions about my family and how we liked living in NC. Shortly thereafter, she changed the subject and started asking questions about many of our high school classmates, throwing out names: Shelly, Missy, Joann, Kathleen, Mindy, Terry, Robin, Sadie, Jodi . . . do you hear from any of them? Did you know what they were up to these days? she asked. She then started asking me about some of our previous teachers: Mr. Rybicki, Mr. Bowers, Mr. Ashe . . . are they still teaching or are they retired by now? she asked. She inquired if anyone started making plans for our high school reunion.  She commented that she hadn't heard anything. She expressed concern that poor Molly has been so involved for most of our reunions every time and someone else really needed to do this job and give her a break. This made me laugh - I told her not to worry about it and assured her someone would eventually raise their hand for the job. She hoped she could make it. If she felt well by then, she definitely wanted to try. By now, her voice was getting groggier and I wanted her to get some sleep. We shared some laughs and I think going down memory lane provided her with a distraction from what she was going through at the time. I told her she needed to hurry up and recover because our gang wanted to have her join us for dinner again at the Mariner. She promised to get back on Facebook soon. I told her she has a lot of people who love her and are praying for her recovery - everyone would be happy to see her post something. We promised to make dinner plans again.  

     Andi, we miss you. Your friendship . . . your laugh . . . the funny stories of your kids . . . your photos on Facebook. Your legacy will live on in our hearts and in your beautiful babies. I know you will be at our reunion this year in spirit . . . we will have a special toast in your honor.

Rest in peace . . . our dear friend . . . our hero.          

My Addiction

     I guess the first step is to admit I have an addiction. My name is Juli and I am addicted to . . . award shows. I feel better now. Whew, a load off my shoulders.

    

     In order to feed this addiction, I watched the Golden Globe Awards last night. Not just the ceremony, but also the pre-awards red carpet event. I just love watching the interviews, the beautiful gowns, the dapper tuxedos and the display of nerves on the actors which proves to me they are just like us, except attending a grown-up prom in front of millions of people. I enjoy seeing my favorite actors outside of their roles and just being "human." We sometimes forget how nervous some of these celebrities may be feeling attending these events: excited for what is to come, perhaps anxious to see an idol across the room. Seasoned actors having attended these events in the past know what to expect. Some enjoy it, using it as an opportunity to mingle with old friends while a few may be there to just get through the obligatory appearance and go home after one drink at the after-party (if they even attend one). Some presenters are praying to make it to the mic without tripping on the stage and being able to read the teleprompter without looking like a fool. Some want to loosen up with their peers at the bar and nosh on fine foods, but at the same time, be able to banter easily with colleagues and other esteemed actors they admire and respect. Some enjoy the attention bestowed upon them while others may be new to this activity, therefore, navigating unchartered waters. Some never get used to the attention and try to shed their inner-introvert with a smile and a handshake. I just love analyzing the psych that surrounds these events. The Golden Globes is a more laid-back version of The Academy Awards (Oscars). Everyone appears more relaxed, seated with their colleagues at tables in a smaller setting rather than the formal seating arrangement of a huge venue such as the Kodak Theatre. I could dedicate a whole blog entry on The Academy Awards, but we’ll wait until after February 26^th.

    

     I was stoked to see one of my favorite actresses, Jessica Lange, win her Best Supporting Actress in a Supporting Role/Drama award for "American Horror Story." She definitely deserved it. What a class act. I have admired her since I saw her in "King Kong" (1976) with Jeff Bridges. I read the book, too, which included photo footage of the movie within the pages. I admired her work again in one of her more haunting performances in "Sweet Dreams" (1985) in which she portrayed Patsy Cline – she disappeared into that role and was truly Patsy. I credit Ms. Lange for my interest back then in Country music and Patsy Cline songs.

    

     As a host, I thought Ricky Gervais knocked it out of the park. Ricky is like sushi to me: not everyone can stomach it, but if you enjoy it, it’s delicious. I personally love Ricky’s humor and the fact that he just doesn’t give a shit what people think. Much like how I feel most of the time. If you don’t want to know the truth, don’t ask. He had some great one-liners and poked a lot of fun at people, but he didn’t go too far. It was enjoyable to watch him onstage this year vs. last year’s painful performance. No one’s panties seemed to get twisted up this year – or so I thought I could see on the TV screen. I especially loved his dig at Jodie Foster’s beaver and she was a great sport. I did cringe a little when I realized later in the show that her sons had attended the ceremony and heard the dig (ew). Seth Rogan almost had me spit out my cheese/cracker when he revealed his attempt to hide his erection standing alongside Kate Beckinsale. Classic. I appreciate raunchy humor and it’s more likely to occur at the Golden Globes vs. the Oscars. Love it! And Jane Fonda? She looked phenomenal in that dress.

    

     Looking forward to the Oscars (Feb 26^th) and the Primetime Emmy Awards (Sept 23^rd)!

Not a Lazy Sunday / Book Excerpt III

Today was a gloomy, rainy Sunday in the mountains, but I woke up to the smell of cooked bacon, pancakes and freshly baked cookies. After I realized I didn't pull into the wrong house last night (LOL - my husband is the best!), I enjoyed a moment of solitude with my java while my kids and their friends slept in. Sometimes, I feel like I run a bed-n-breakfast for my kids' social circles, but then I shouldn't complain - at least my kids like bringing their friends over and hanging out. Feels good to always know where my kids are and they're safe. As much as I would like to enjoy the occasional quiet time, I'm thankful their friends like to come over. Thank goodness for Sam's so we get snacks in bulk. After their friends left to go home, my son and I decided to go bowling which is something we haven't done in a long time. I forgot how much fun it was and the pleasure of wearing the most godawful, ugly shoes.

We had a good time and my little man bowled two strikes! Here's one of them:

Beaten by a 10-year-old. He's very competitive and doesn't like to lose, so lucky for him, I suck at bowling. Okay, I know you can see the gutters in the footage. They're for me, not him - yes, I'm that bad. When we moved on to a game of pool, I showed him who was boss. See, I'm actually good at pool. I learned to play well during college because (a) I enjoyed it and (b) I thought it was a great way to meet guys. I showed the little guy a few tricks on positioning himself and aiming for specific pockets. My coolness factor went up a notch in his eyes.

After running a few errands at Walmart (always lovely to people-watch there), we headed home in time to watch my beloved Steelers in the playoffs. Sadly, they lost. Devastating. I thought for sure we would get a field goal after we went into overtime, but the Broncos surprised us with a touchdown. My son even wore his lucky Troy Palomalo wig, but to no avail. I'm in mourning and will be wearing black to the office tomorrow. My co-workers and bosses know what a dedicated Steelers fan I am and know not to talk to me about the loss. A moment of silence, please . . . . at least the Steelers' paraphernalia will be on sale tomorrow, so I can prepare for next season. Okay, I feel a teenie-weenie bit better now.

I've made some progress on my book. Below is another excerpt:

COLLEGE YEARS
     I loved to party. I was very social during my college years, craving that continuous connection with my friends as well as searching for love. Sometimes this led me down some comical paths.
     I attended the University of Pittsburgh from 1987 through 1989, but needed to transfer to a smaller school – did I mention I loved to party? Yep, instead of excelling in my grades, I excelled in blowing off steam. My grades suffered at Pitt and this didn’t sit well with my parents because I was on a free ride. Back then, I could not have cared less. My only goal at that point in my life was just to get by and pass my classes while scoping out for the next party alert to surface. My mother saw the path I was going down and suggested I consider transferring to a smaller college. We investigated Point Park University, a smaller, private (and very expensive) option. Mom saw this as my way out of trouble and to focus better on my classes. Point Park also had a very good reputation as a higher learning institution, well-known for its school of journalism/communications and performing arts. Things improved slightly for me as I pursued my degree in journalism and I became involved in extracurricular activities, such as Student Government and college basketball cheerleading.  I did not have any experience with cheerleading growing up and I had no business trying out. I did it on a dare and was fully prepared to not make it. I had planned to laugh about the experience over a few beers later. Imagine my surprise when I actually made the squad. I really pissed off a couple of girls who had cheered in high school and certainly deserved to be on the squad. To this day, I'm still not quite sure I know how I made it, but it's possible they didn't want the cookie-cutter personality. I was always down-to-earth and didn't change my tune when I talked to certain people. I talked to guys the same way I talked to my girlfriends. I did have 13 years of dancing school experience. Many of the half-time shows consisted of dance routines and seemed to be moving further away from the traditional cheer-only performances. I decided to stick with the squad and, to my surprise, I found I enjoyed it. The games were fun to watch and I had the best seats in the house being a part of the excitement. And, yes, I got invited to some great parties. 

     Attending a smaller, private college afforded me the opportunity to get to know a lot of people in a short amount of time because we would run into each other frequently. This enabled my friends and I to circulate the party connections and get to know the Van Wilders of the campus. One of them in particular was an art student who I thought was cute enough for me to get to know better. He had a party one night in his dorm room that my friend Amy and I attended. Free beer, fun conversations and convenient - his dorm building was connected to ours with a walking bridge over the dividing street - no need to travel far and we didn't have to bundle up in 20 degree weather. Two beers turned into several and I woke up the next morning on his bed with him. We were both fully clothed so I know nothing happened aside from the typical make-out session. Only one problem - I couldn't hear a damn thing. Using "Van Wilder's" phone, I called Amy and informed her I couldn't find my hearing aids and I didn't remember taking them off. I also advised her not to bother saying anything because I couldn't hear her - I just needed her to get over here and rescue me. Within minutes, she was rapping quietly on the door and I let her in. We didn't want to wake up Van Wilder and his roommates, so we decided to find the aids ourselves. She and I crawled around the room on all fours, feeling the sticky, gross floor and under the beds. Nothing. We even searched the garbage buckets. Ew, nothing. I really started to panic. Then Amy recalled seeing party-goers occasionally taking trash bags of beer cans and bottles out to the hallway garbage room. At this point, desperate measures were necessary. Bet most of you can't attest to dumpster-diving for hearing aids - I can! Amy and I emptied every one of those garbage bags and low-and-behold, found my hearing aids in the very last one. To this day, I don't know how the hell they ended up in the garbage and I probably don't want to know. Nothing will sober you up faster than coming thisclose to losing $2,000 worth of hearing aids and having to make that dreadful call your parents. Of course, the phone call would have been one-sided since I wouldn’t have been able to hear them.

     Mom, Dad, I have something I need to tell you, but you need me speak. I lost my hearing aids.

     What?! How the hell did that happen?

     What did you say? Listen, just let me get this out.

     Where were you when you lost them? Do know how much those things cost? 

     Wait, I’m sorry, maybe YOU didn't hear me - I said I CAN'T HEAR YOU! I lost my hearing aids, remember?! Gotta go . . . Bye! 

     Okay, that conversation never happened, but I could only imagine what a disaster I would have faced.  

Happy New Year: Reflections & Resolutions

     I wish I could say my 2012 is off to a great start, but I ended up going to bed New Year's Eve at 9:30pm with a fever, chills and a migraine. A real bummer because I had planned to watch Dick Clark's Rockin' New Year's Eve with my hubby and enjoy shrimp cocktail, sushi and champagne while my daughter had a couple of girlfriends over for a slumber party. Didn't get to enjoy any good food or spirits - bleh. I did feel a little better on New Year's day, but I still had the residual headache and my voice sounded like I smoked 20 cigars last night. Some guys like the sound of a husky voice on a woman, but it didn't feel sexy to me. Felt much better today, returning to work. I don't let a silly illness get in the way of my writing, so I have listed my top 2011 picks below:
    
MY TOP 5 FAVORITE MOVIES OF 2011:

1. The Rise of the Planet of Apes - I was rooting for the apes.
2. Paranormal Activity III - The scariest of the series!
3. Bridesmaids - Brilliant - I laughed so hard, I cried.
4. X-Men: First Class - I'm a huge fan of this franchise - the actors were superb.
5. The Help - One word - AMAZING.

MY TOP 5 BOOKS OF 2011:

1. Bossypants - Tina Fey
2. The Hunger Games - Suzanne Collins
3. The Help - Kathryn Stockett
4. Water for Elephants - Sara Gruen
5. A Discovery of Witches - Deborah Harkness 

MY TOP 5 TV SHOWS OF 2011:

1. Modern Family
2. The Middle
3. Grey's Anatomy
4. American Idol
5. The X Factor

MY TOP 5 ALBUMS OF 2011:

1. 21 - Adele
2. Get Closer - Keith Urban
3. Born This Way - Lady Gaga
4. Teenage Dream - Katy Perry
5. Here and Now - Nickelback

MY TOP 5 SINGLES OF 2011:

1. Rolling in the Deep - Adele
2. Someone Like You - Adele
3. Marry the Night - Lady Gaga
4. Long Hot Summer - Keith Urban
5. Pumped Up Kicks - Foster the People

     As you can see above, my taste spans across genres.  2011 has been a fulfilling year for me. I started writing my book and started my first on-line blog. I also started something new by taking fiddle lessons, which has been fun. The kids have grown and matured, getting involved with more activities and their social circles. My husband's business is thriving and his clientele is expanding. My career has become more challenging yet interesting as I learn more about the oncology field. We finally moved into a brand new cancer center on the hospital's campus and I have grown internally with my love for being a part of something big for the Western NC region.

     I hope 2012 will continue to prosper for us as well as for my friends and loved ones.  I typically don't do new resolutions. In the past, I would attempt to promise to lose weight, cut down on my cussing (this will never work, LOL - outside of work, I have a potty-mouth, but I try to limit it around my kids), or work-out more. Too much pressure on myself. What I can promise to do for 2012 is live better than I did the year before and try something new. I'm looking forward to my third trip to Ireland in May.  My "try something new" will be when I get my first (and probably only) tattoo while I'm in Ireland. I've already been in touch with the owner of the parlor in Galway via e-mail and have everything planned out. I haven't told my mother yet, who is flying there with me - I'm sure she'll think I've lost my mind - but I wanted to do something to commemorate this trip. My husband is not thrilled - he's afraid I'll contract hepatitis (he doesn't have any tattoos) - but I assured him this place is very reputable and I did my research. I'm excited for what 2012 will bring!