Mother's Day is coming soon - May 13th to be exact. Kids, get out your stationary, markers and scissors. Dad, don't wait until the last minute to order those flowers . . . a Pandora bracelet is always a nice last-minute gift, too, if you feel like going the extra mile (or not).
I happened to look at the calendar this morning and thought about my own role as a mom. I'm a wife and a working mom. Have been a wife for almost 19 years and a mom for 15 years. To me, it's like having three jobs: (1) co-pilot/provider/supporter with my husband; (2) mother to my beautiful two children; and (3) an administrative professional for a large, regional cancer center. I'm on paid salary for only one of those jobs while the other two are priceless. I've been in the workforce since I was 18 years old with the exception of two maternity leaves and a 3-month break when we moved from FL to NC in 2009. That 3-month break was the best time. It gave me a wonderful opportunity to get settled in our new home and help the kids get acclimated to our new environment. The quality time I spent with my husband and children during that time was immeasurable. And, I got to live out my fantasy of being a stay-at-home mom.
I've always been career oriented, wanting to be successful in my professional endeavors as well as help provide a stable environment for my family. My gain: a little extra financial stability. My loss: about an hour less with my kids in the evening, little less organized house and piled up laundry I dread to face at times. Sometimes the evening meals will be an instant-cook-in-the-fryer or an occasional trip to McDonald's. But, I'm fortunate in that my work schedule allows weekends off so I can be with my family - not everyone has that luxury. At times, I would look with a little envy at some of my friends who were stay-at-home moms. They got to spend a more quality time with their children when they were small and be with them more for after school activities or help out in the classroom more. Fortunately, my husband is my partner in this effort as we would share the responsibility of helping in the classroom, running our kids to friends' or taking our son to karate practice. It's all a balancing act as I am constantly juggling balls that each represent my roles, responsibilities and activities and praying I don't drop one.
My mother has always worked. She was part-time as an RN while I was little and became full-time as I grew older. It never bothered me - I just never knew any different. My grandmother worked, too. No matter how much my mother worked, she always had time for me and I never felt I was lacking her attention or love. She was always there to help me with my homework or school projects and made time to ensure I ate my breakfast before rushing out the door to catch my bus.
I got to thinking about my own juggling act after a reading about the recent current events. A lot of traffic has generated across the Internet and news' outlets over Hilary Rosen's remark regarding Ann Romney never having "worked a day in her life." Ouch. I do see two sides to this situation. First side: Many perceived this as an insensitive remark towards stay-at-home moms. I have the utmost respect for stay-at-home moms and I feel they work incredibly hard, not just at home, but outside of the household to ensure responsibilities are fulfilled. This may include a lot of running around to various destinations, carpools, activities, trips, etc. There are financial obligations as many coordinate the budget for the home and the children. Second side: Many perceived Ann's remarks were taken out of context because they felt she made a statement in referencing Mrs. Romney not having "worked" to interpret as "not having contributed financially." Regardless, everyone knows that to some, perception is reality. There are no right or wrong answers here. Sometimes, it's best not to say anything if will possibly result in ruffled feathers. When a war like this rages - as has been for decades - there are never any winners.
Mothers - whether we work outside of the home or in the household - are a force to be reckoned with. We will fight to the death for our children, our family and our home. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter "where" we work.
